Secret Labs X

X Films:True Confessions of a Radical Filmmaker

2008-11-29T13:10:00.000-08:00

Here's a Christmas gift idea for yourself, or that filmmaker complicating your life. I have this book and just finished reading it to get my mind momentarily off the clown-car onParliament Hill driving around Ottawa. Alex Cox has made some of my most admired and favourite movies out there. Especially Repo Man, Sid and Nancy, Walker and the little seen El Patrullero (Highway Patrolman). Not only does he walk you through the nuts and bolts of getting these ten fantastic oddities on to the screen (including financing), but he still possesses a lot of passion and inspiration. For example:

"Talking to students and younger people now, I get the impression that they think a film is 'given' to a filmmaker - by a studio, or a production company. This is not so. If you are a real filmmaker, a film is something you personally conceive, and then, in partnership with similarly minded colleagues, make yourself. ... It is entirely within your power."

Cox and myself have a similar love for Once upon a Time in the West, The Searchers, The Clash, Mexican food and a DIY attitude. Some of the stories are spicy, including getting punched in the face by an extra...who waited until the last day of photography to do it. The only dirt I wished he had touched upon, was getting fired from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. He's also a huge activist when it comes to fighting lousy copyright laws.

"On Paul Robeson's tombstone are the words ' The artist must elect to fight for freedom or slavery. I made my choice. I had no alternative.' What this great actor said applies to writers, to journalists, and indeed to almost everybody. But not everyone is in the fortunate position of the artist, able to weigh the political implications of each possible job, and to accept or reject the work accordingly. The choices that we make, as artists, hackers, or filmmakers, are visible in our work. No one is forced to make a film. Slavery is profitable. Freedom is difficult. Money is plentiful for those who promote obedience; it's in short supply for those who disobey. And yet, all over the world, people refuse to be slaves, and give up careers, and even lives, because their sense of self-worth, or their communities survival obliges them to. Another world is possible."

His ideas for a new film or digital world will get your gears turning. You may not agree with all of it, but it does get the blood flowing. If you run across the book, pick it up. You won't be disappointed. If you want to know more about the man go to his website.

Burn It Down

2008-11-27T13:10:00.000-08:00

Finished a last pass of screenplay called 'Final Girl' and sent off to my writing partner to clean up. Then off it goes to Corus...if there's any money left in the last draw-down. Contractually there is. For the next few months I'm done with it. I'm creatively tapped out. In other words...I got nothin'...for now. Do I think it's perfect? Nope. But it's a hell of a lot better than scripts falling across my desktop and cloggin the email that are going into production and frantically trying to 'fix it' as they prep. Anyway, other projects call my name, one of which has received some dough. I'll write about them later.

Meanwhile, Canadian Broadcasters are culling the deadwood and trying to build a new business model in an economic crisis. Or hold onto the old one...it's hard to tell. While I'm sure some folks I know will be hurt by the moves, my empathy is there, but I have little sympathy. See my old post 'Blood Clots in the Revenue Stream' from October. All of us, consumers and content creators have been barking for changes, so here they come. Will they all turn out like you hoped? Probably not, but maybe...just maybe...it can become leaner and meaner and start rewarding success instead of failure. But it took a crisis and a CRTCruling to burn down the barn and get the old horses running off. Jim Henshaw makes some good points on hisblog.

So, are we driving down a disappearing lane with a dead end? Broadcasters will inevitably stink up the place with howls of 'Now we can't even afford Canadian content'. Maybe, but that's an old song that's been sung for years. They have barely provided Canadian content anyway. Maybe it's an excuse to pull a few licenses on channels that claim they are providing new content. Every time I turn on the friggin TV I have so many channels that have the same four shows showing over and over that my head swims with resentment. The three Canuckbroadcasters that double and triple dip the consumer and then reported billions in profit. They are the skunk under the house who just keeps coming back with the same smell.

I know what your thinking. Trevor, you should be concerned because now all of these broadcasters have no money to help put your scripts in front of the camera. Really? They never did in the first place. Speciality Cable companies, Americans and Europeans put dough in my work. Not the Big-3 Canadian broadcasters. And that just doesn't include me, it is friends, family and fellow workers in the industry. Yep. Times will be lean, but when aren't they.

The real keys are timing, good work, and the learned ability to know a hot wire when you see one. People who count on luck don't last long in this business of defusing bombs and Canadian broadcasters have been churning out bombs, depending on luck and free money. They connected the wrong wires this time. But, like all human beings and nature's predators, they followed the path of least resistance.

Maybe that makes me an anarchist who wants to watch it all burn so that something else takes it place. Maybe. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see that I have a dark sense of humour. Which reminds me, it does my heart good when I see Heath Ledger already being pushed as a 'Supporting Actor' candidate in the up coming Oscar votes.

So, that's about it for my half-assed wisdom for tonight. Right now I am focused on going out in my back yard and shooting a metaphorical bear who weighs five hundred pounds and is in a feeding frenzy. He wants my time, my money and sympathy. I don't have any. Not tonight. Just a shotgun and a 'redneck' attitude. I don't want to kill the bear. Just sting it in the ass and make it move along and stop digging in the garbage. I'm a territorialman. I don't mind sharing with him, but the bear is rude and he makes a mess when he eats. I'm sure you can guess what the bear is.

Stitches in the Bone Garden

2008-11-21T13:09:00.000-08:00

Here we are. Cool fog raising goose flesh on your arms. The full moon shining up above. Gnarled branches scratching the night sky. A forest of marble monuments and tombstones looming before you. You recognize the scene, don't you? Sure you do. Any horror writer worth his salt recognizes Dr. Frankenstein's favourite bone garden. Just as you remember why the good doctor invariably makes the cemetery his first stop, it's the mad scientist's first rule - if you're gonna make a monster, your gonna need parts.

Creating a script isn't much different. Just as Frankenstein's Monster is a crazy quilt of dear-departed humanity, your script will be an amalgam of influences. Which is why you must...get this...read...and read widely. Mad scientists open graves. Writers open books. Books? 'Why I have all the screenwriting books in the world!" you say.

Recently I have been catching up on my reading. I've learned a great deal from novelists in all kinds of genres. For me, crime writers are a big influence in developing elements of my work. I learn a great deal about pace and plot and have found my best teachers in writers such as Elmore Leonard, Jim Thompson, John D. Macdonald and lately Duane Swierczynski. Now please, don't get the impression that I'm telling you to imitate other writers, especially when it comes to style, but you could learn a thing or two from these folks. For instance, take Elmore Leonard's ten rules for writing:

1. Never open a book with weather.
2. Avoid prologues.
3. Never use a verb other than ''said'' to carry dialogue.
4. Never use an adverb to modify the verb ''said'' . . .
5. Keep your exclamation points under control.
6. Never use the words ''suddenly'' or ''all hell broke loose.''
7. Use regional dialect, patois, sparingly.
8. Avoid detailed descriptions of characters.
9. Don't go into great detail describing places and things.
10. Try to leave out the part that readers tend to skip.
Not all of that can be applied to screenplays, but it is inspiring. Leonard says his most important rule is one that sums up the ten: "If it sounds like writing, I rewrite it."

Now, back to the monster you want to create, and you're still determined to make a go of this mad scientist business. You're stitching it together, working everyday. You're reading. You're writing. You're putting in the time. But you don't want to overdo it. What do I mean? Too much 'mood' and an extra dollop of flowery description and your story will read like a parody. It's the 'hey Ma, look at me write' syndrome and it's usually from over-thinking and creating prose. Too much of a good thing is indeed too much of a good thing.

But also remember that even Dr. Frankenstein had his failures. That nasty bit of business with Igor and the abnormal brain, for example. But the good doc wasn't a quitter. When things didn't work out the way he'd planned, Victor Frankenstein always got out his shovel and headed back to the cemetery. So don't give up. Put in the time. Write and READ something other than this blog and get the fuck off facebook for a while and stitch that monster together. Would it kill you to read a book?

Donkeys and Flares

2008-11-20T13:09:00.000-08:00

" There is no terror in the bang, only in the anticipation of it," said theultimate master of terror, Alfred Hitchcock. I read a couple of my favourite blogs this morning, Boot in the Pants and Dead Things ON Sticks. Both writing about imminent disaster, canceling Christmas and the down-sizing of Canadian networks and images of buildings being demolished. Read 'em. They're good. Don't be lazy, just go to the sidebar.

Today a pretty young woman came knocking on my door and she had brought her kid with her. Who could this be? I opened the door and said " Hi." She smiled, said hello, then quickly asked "How do you define success?" "That's a pretty big question" was all I could say. Then I looked at what she was carrying in her hand, and...well...I'll get to the rest later, but above is a picture of what she gave me.

Millions of people around the world are watching headlines these days, most of them are getting pumped full of fear. Good news is out of the question in this brutal year of our Lord 2008. This, it would appear, to be the time of the Final Shit Rain, as Nostradamus predicted in 1444 A.D. I think the Aztecs, according to their calenders, have all of us croaking around 2012. Anybody who thinks these prophets and media-types are kidding should strut out, like some all-American girl with a head full of hope, and try and get a job. Yes sir, little sweetie, just walk right up here and get what's coming to you. By all media accounts, welcome to bombs and poverty. You are about to start paying for the sins of your gas-guzzling fathers and yummy mommies with credit cards.

The deal is going south and we're down to our last cannonball. Don't even get started on Christmas and the retail market. Nobody ever seems to have money on Christmas anyway? The only difference is that the rich are begging for bailouts and jabbering frantically into their cellphones and Blackberries about Santa Claus and suicide or joining a church with no rules. We the taxpayer are about to become Santa Claus for these nitwits. Who knows why? But politicians will have their reasons. They'll fashion some horrible Kafka-like economic story to convince us it's a good thing. But in the end, it won't matter any more than a full moon behind the clouds. These folks are like that drunken friend who keeps wanting to borrow money...just for now...so that they can get better. They say that they're in a 'transition period' and just need a few bucks to get them through. Then they keep coming back every few years pleading the same case.

Anyway, it appears (according to the media, banks and my mystery visitor) I should invest in a mule, saddle it with pots, pans and other provisions and wait for the coming collapse. It'll be like going to the bridge inApocalypse Now...magnum phosphorus flares in the air, weeping, no one is in charge and all you can do is pray. Speaking of praying, back to my visitor this morning.

If you haven't figured out by now, she was a Jehovah's Witness. She asked if I define success by fame, money or power? I didn't have an answer. But my guess is this: get on with life...one foot in front of the other...one step at a time.

Professionals and Amateurs

2008-11-17T13:09:00.000-08:00

When I say professional, I don't mean doctors and lawyers, those of 'the professions'. I mean the Professional as an ideal. The professional in contrast to the amateur. Consider the differences. Here is what Pressfields 'The War of Art' states:

The amateur plays for fun. The professional plays for keeps. To the amateur, the game is his avocation. To the pro it's his vocation. The amateur plays part-time, the professional full-time. The amateur is a weekend warrior. The professional is there seven days a week.

The word amateur comes from the Latin root meaning 'to love.' The conventional interpretation is that the amateur pursues his calling out of love, while the pro does it for money. Not the way I see it. In my view, the amateur does not love the game enough. If he did, he would not pursue it as a sideline, distinct from his 'real' vocation.

The professional loves it so much he dedicates his life to it. He commits full-time. All of us are pros in one area: our jobs. We get a paycheck. We work for money. We are professionals. Here are the principles:
- we show up everyday
- we show up no matter what
- we stay on the job all day
- we are committed over the long haul
- the stakes for us are high and real
- we accept renumeration for our labour
- we master the technique of our job
- we receive praise and blame from the real world

Now consider the amateur and how he pursues his calling:
- he doesn't show up everyday
- he doesn't show up no matter what
- he doesn't stay on the job all day
- he is not in it for the long haul
- the stakes are illusions and fake
- he does not get money
- has not mastered technique because no work is committed to
- he does expose his work to the real world, only support groups, friends or family

Nothing is as empowering as real-world validation, even if it's for failure. Someone asked Somerset Maugham if he wrote on a schedule or only when struck by inspiration. "I write only when inspiration strikes. Fortunately it strikes every morning at nine o'clock sharp."

That's a professional. Maugham was saying a deeper truth: that by performing the mundane physical act of sitting down and starting the work on time, he set in motion a sequence of events that produced a result. He knew if he built it and did the work, the Muse would come.

Unfortunately, we are in the time of the amateur in my profession. Below is a satirical report from The Onion. Funny as it is, this satire works because it is based on a truth.

YouTube Contest Challenges Users To Make A 'Good' Video

2008-11-17T13:08:00.000-08:00

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Funny, but satire has a whole load of truth.

A Breakdown

2008-11-12T12:41:00.000-08:00

When I'm hired to do breakdowns or schedules for producers based on a screenplay they have in development, I'm always blown away. Why? After reading the screenplay several times and 'tagging it', there are SO MANY SCENES ABOUT NOTHING. Followed closely by crap that is unfilmable.

These 'breakdowns' are also referred to as 'boarding', a process of organizing the film into a literal or theoretical shoot. This helps in budgeting, of course, and logistics...really, it's all about how much money are we spending? Some of you may know this, but a board is made up showing the scene numbers, the characters, physical elements (cars, stunts, effects etc). The scene is identified by both number and by logline, a description of the scene just sufficient for its ID eg., Johnny looks at the map. Will Dixon falls down the stairs. I was preparing one this weekend and have done so many I have lost count. I looked at the board when it was finished, reading the loglines, and saw that three of the scenes had the 'same logline'. Actually, A LOT of the scenes had similar loglines. I re-read and realized that those scenes are indeed about the same thing.

What's my advice? If you can't figure out what the scene is about CUT IT. If it is necessary, than only once.

They say you get to make a movie three times. When you write it, when you shoot it, and when you cut it. I believe one really doesn't start to learn how to write a script until on has been on a set. On the set you learn the difference between what is filmable and what are merely pretty words. Some screenplays I breakdown as a First AD read like a personals column. The descriptions of characters are: beautiful, smart, funny, likes long walks in the park, honest, sexy. Others are about what can be seen out the window in a particular office. Better yet,'She's the kind of girl who....', which you can write all day but neither helps an actor or director or me in helping to implement it. All of these scripts read like begging letters that are trying to please. What's wrong with trying to please? Nothing. But all that gobblygook has worked not to please the audience but some co-dependent or mysterious 'other' that has little baring on the story.

Another says it better than I....

A script is a succession of scenes, each scene must end so that the protagonist is thwarted in his/her goal - so that he/she is forced to go to the next scene to get what they want. That's it . That's all you really need. The scene need not be ' interesting', 'meaningful' 'revelatory of character', and so on, all of these are synonyms for 'it stinks on ice'. - David Mamet

Another peice of advice: Use some of your development money to do a preliminary breakdown and have your screenplay 'boarded'. It'll be an eye-opener in terms of what is filmable and give you a fighting chance to see it going beyond gathering dust on your book shelf.

Show, Don't Tell

2008-11-10T12:40:00.000-08:00

One of my favourite movies is Michael Mann's "Thief" . It is from a different time, 1981 to be exact. Today, hard boiled noir and thrillers have been devalued by the routine repetition of the same dumb chases, sex scenes, and gunfights. Not that I don't like that in a cheap sort of way, but "Thief" is completely out of the ordinary. And there is not aCGI car crash or stunt in sight. Then again, filmmakers did not have those tools at their disposal. So am I just being nostalgic? No. There are other reasons.

The movie stars James Caan and as the movie opens, he's been free four years, and lives in Chicago. He is a highly skilled professional thief -- a trade he learned behind bars from Okla (Willie Nelson), a master thief. The film's opening sequence establishesCaan's expertise as he cracks a safe with a portable drill and an 8,000 degree thermal lance used to cut through a nearly impregnable safe. Some of the bit parts are played by real-life, highly successful jewel thieves, who acted as consultants. And their presence informs the superb dialogue, as every word rings true. To add to the fun, Mann cast real ex-cops to play the criminals. The movie leads up to one final caper, a $4 million diamond heist in Los Angeles, and then it ends in a series of double crosses and a rain of violence.

I keep going back to this movie every few years for several reasons. One is that "Thief" is able to convince us that it knows its subject, knows about the methods and criminal personalities of its characters. Another is that it's well cast: Every important performance in this movie successfully creates a plausible person, instead of the stock-company supporting characters we might have expected. And the film moves at a taut pace, creating tension and anxiety through very effective photography and a wound-up, pulsing score by Tangerine Dream. Though only slightly dated, it is still one of those soundtracks I'll write to, along with Vangelis' 'Blade Runner'.

Thief was Michael Mann's first theatrical film, and all the elements that characterize his later style (and this is a very stylistic film) are dominant. I love the story . It is simple and well-realized. The opening sequence and it's music remain one of my favourites. Visual story telling at it's best with so little dialogue you could count the lines on one hand. Something I still struggle to aspire to in my own screenplays. We participate with the Thief's plight and the movie shows instead of telling. That's why it still stands up today. The first ten minutes are posted above, but do yourself a favour. Find. Rent it and enjoy it on a bigger screen than this.

Cold Weather and Boneheaded Predictions

2008-11-07T12:40:00.000-08:00

It's playoff time and with it comes the weather. Rain and hopefully snow. I wish I were at Taylor Field (fuck the Mosaic-pesticide-Stadium moniker that hurts my ears every time it's spoken) with a thermos full of hot rum. Here are my predictions this week. Last week I was awful (1-3). but, for the most part I've been dead-on this year. But...BUT...the playoffs can be a whole different world in the CFL and making predictions about it seem boneheaded. Here it goes anyway...

1:00 PM Saturday, November 08, 2008
Edmonton
@
Winnipeg

This game could go either way, but I was not impressed with the play of Edmonton last week against Montreal team that sat a lot of starters. It was an exhibition game in my books, and as I've stated before, I can't recall a first place finisher EVER benefiting from sitting starters in the past five years. Especially in the playoffs. It has amounted the stale play and horrible choking when the time counts. But more on Montreal later, onward. In a playoff game with lousy weather, we all know the running game can be the difference between winning and losing. For Edmonton to win, they need to stop the combination of Fred Reid and Joe Smith. Both running backs from September through October have played very well. If either of these backs have a big afternoon, Winnipeg can beat Edmonton. Of the six teams that are in the playoffs, it is the Eskimos that have displayed the highest level of inconsistency complimented by poor coaching. When you look at what happened between the two teams this season, they split their season series with each team winning at home. Can Winnipeg establish Reid and Smith? Can Ray play as well this week as he did last week? Of these two questions, I think the latter is more likely to have a positive answer. Ray outshines Glenn in this one. And I HATE the Eskimos. Edmonton moves on to the East Final in Montreal. Prediction: Edmonton 26, Winnipeg 17.

Final: Edmonton 29. Winnipeg 21. The score flatters Winnipeg. Could a home playoff game and it's fans and team look more flat even at kick-off? Milt Stegall and The Press say Kevin Glenn considers himself part of the leagues under-appreciated QBs. Well, those top tier QBs win games when it counts and you, Mr. Glenn, have not EARNED that title. This attitude is what awarded Glenn a trade and release from Saskatchewan years ago. He thinks he deserves things without earning them. Edmonton rightfully moves on. Winnipeg should fire it's rabid/asshole coach who only inspires flaccid play and bring in fresh eyes on a mouthy bunch who do not understand hard work.

4:30 PM Saturday, November 08, 2008
B.C.
@
Saskatchewan

Oh boy. Toss a coin. And why the hell are the Lions considered under-dogs? You can read all the papers and the pundits about this game. The Roughriders have the definite advantage playing at home, as they have a unique energy level at Taylor Field. The energy level will be higher than ever before, along with heavy drinking and an ugly attitude in the stands. Police and security have been tripled for this game. The Lions have won two-of-three against the Riders this season. Going into this game, there is a nasty point to make, and that is the Lions have recently won in Regina and were pelted with booze as a result. Riders' quarterback Michael Bishop is going to make some mistakes. The Lions have the best defensive line in the CFL this season. The Riders defensive front four has looked long in the tooth. Chick is back, but will he make a difference? If Bishop repeats his four interception performance of last week's game against Toronto, this one will be over very quickly and B.C. will move on to the West Final in Calgary by half-time. You've heard it a thousand friggin' times, but to win games, you eliminate the mistakes. For the Lions, their biggest challenge will be the Rider defence and more specifically, the linebackers. The Riders' linebackers and defensive linemen need to be ready to play because it will be up to them to win this game.The Lions' combination of Buck Pierce and Jarious Jackson provides an edge at quarterback over Bishop. What is NOT being discussed are special teams. Neither team set the house on fire in this regard, but Saskatchewan is probably the worst in the League in terms of coverage and returns. My hands tremble as I write this and I will be flogged by Saskatchewan pals, but in the end, I think the Lions will advance to next week's final. Prediction: BC 33, Riders 28.

Final: BC 33. Saskatchewan 12. To say the Riders under-performed is an understatement. The better team won...by a long shot. I'm not surprised and you have proof by reading the above. Eric Tillman is not a dumb man. Look for Miller and him to recruit or sign a major QB. Solidify an aging offensive and defensive line. The special teams fumbled twice tonight and Micheal Bishop's career is over as a starting QB. The rest are all stars.

Happy betting and Your Welcome!

EAGLES OF DEATH METAL - I Want You So Hard (Boy's Bad News)

2008-11-06T12:40:00.000-08:00

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Eagles of Death Metal Gets a Heart On

2008-11-06T12:39:00.000-08:00

While I've been working on ' Final Girl', I can't top listening to this band. Eagles of Death Metal is was formed by Jesse Hughes and Josh Homme. Despite the name, Eagles of Death Metal is not a death metal band. Josh Homme inspired him to write music that he thought would be The Eagles crossed with death metal, and their debut album was the result. The sound of the band is a combination of bluegrass slide guitar mixed with stripper drum beats and Canned Heat vocals.

EODM's latest fabulous weapon, 'Heart On', is a top-secret music missile, a sonic warhead sexually tipped for her pleasure, shot from the deck of USS Mantastic Fantastic.

45 RPM

2008-11-05T12:39:00.000-08:00

Here's a cool little 'coming-of-age' movie called ' 45 rpm'. I worked on the show last year and it should be showing up near you soon. Was I damn excited to work with Michael Madsen? Oh yeah! As First AD, I hid my silly fan boy awe. A pro and a fantastic guy.
Here's the synopsis:

It’s the Autumn of 1960. Fifteen-year-old Parry Tender doesn’t know where to turn. Hassled by the local cop, Parry wants out of his small town hell. He’s lived in Goose Lake all his live. It isn’t much; about two hundred folks in all give or take. It’s five hundred miles north of nowhere which to the satisfaction of the
United States Air Force makes it only five hundred miles south of the “DEWLINE”,
a continent wide chain of early warning radar stations constructed across
Canada’s Arctic during the paranoia of the Cold War. With its four-thousand-foot
gravel runway, Saskatchewan’s Goose Lake is the perfect spot to airlift men and
materials into Canada’s frozen north. It’s all very secret – all very boring – and no
one wants out more than Parry.

Parry isn’t asking for much. He only wants a little more that he already has which
is an old Cree grandfather named Peter George who isn’t even kin, and his best
and only friend Luke, a thirteen year old girl who looks and acts more like a boy.
Parry knows the dangers of small town life. Suicide cured his mother’s troubles,
and his father? Well, that’s another story.

When a fluke atmospheric condition allows a fifty thousand watt Manhattan radio
station to pump its infectious rock’n’roll signal into Canada’s far north and out
through the small paper speaker of Parry’s RCA radio, Luke can’t believe their
luck. WABC – New York, 770 on the AM dial is running a radio contest. The
winner and a guest will be flown to New York City to attend Alan Freed’s Fourth
of July rock’n’roll party at the Brooklyn Paramount. It all seems simple enough.
Parry and Luke will win their escape from Goose Lake. But when Debbie Baxter,
the pretty daughter of an American Army Air Force Major steels Parry’s heart, no
one is certain what will happen next.

Check out the movie's website if you want to know more here .

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Original video source (video-play.mp4)

Slashers and Back Roads

2008-11-04T12:38:00.000-08:00

A Final Girl as defined by Carol J. Clover in her book 'Men, Women and Chainsaws': The final girl is a horror film (particularly slasher film) trope that specifically refers to the last woman or girl alive to confront the killer, ostensibly the one left to tell the story.

The final girl is typically sexually unavailable or virginal, avoiding the vices of the victims (sex, narcotic usage, etc). She sometimes has a unisex name (e.g. Teddy, Billie, Georgie, Sidney). Occasionally the Final Girl will have a shared history with the killer. The final girl is the "investigating consciousness" of the film, moving the narrative forward and as such, she exhibits intelligence, curiosity, and vigilance.

I'm diving into another round of 'Final Girl' this week, based on notes from my collaborator, Noel Baker (Hard Core Logo). Killer first act. Nasty, fun third act. Guess where the problems are? Yep. Second Act. But I look forward to it. It's chance to fix plot holes, flesh-out motives, speed up the pace...and knock-off more characters. In other words, more layers to this blood-soaked layer cake. For obvious reasons, that's all I can reveal about this script. There is Movie Central development money behind it.

The script is brimming with sex and violence - dismembered limbs, buckets of blood, and gratuitous pantie shots. But under that (the surface elements, not the panties) is a sly sense of humour and 'girl-power'. It's also about small towns.

Growing up in Saskatchewan I can identify with my female protagonist. Small towns and two small cities - the isolation, repression, and all the other plights of being on the prairies. My childhood is haunted by racists, gun-crazy hunters, drunk hordes of football fans, John Deere caps, old high school chums and endless stretches ofunlit gravel back roads. And above all - the fear that one will be eternally trapped in a rural wasteland dying of boredom and routine. But the best of the slasher medium is all about confronting our fears with humour, absurdity, and over-the-top sensibilities. Final Girl taps into that, turning a tired genre on it's head. You may have noticed there is a blogspot in the sidebar called Final Girl. No relation, but check it out if your a slasher genre fan. It's fun to read.

Now, onto that second act.

One Blood Shake and a Side-Order of Blame

2008-11-03T12:37:00.000-08:00

And quick please. What am I and a few other 'content creators' blogging about? Well, check out this article about a killer filmmaker. I love horror movies, thrillers and pulp...but here's part of a real story from today's newspapers:

Edmonton filmmaker heads to court in script-written murder-case

DEAN BENNETT, THE CANADIAN PRESS

November 2, 2008 at 6:44 PM EST

EDMONTON — In a case police call a diabolically cruel convergence of art and life, local filmmaker Mark Twitchell will appear in court tomorrow charged with first-degree murder.

The 29-year-old fervid fan of the psycho-slasher TV show Dexter is accused of luring now-missing JohnnyAltinger to a garage and killing him in a scenario that resembled Mr. Twitchell's latest film project – in which a man is abducted, tortured and hacked to bits.

“We have a lot of information to suggest he definitely idolizes Dexter and a lot of information that he tried to emulate him during this incident,” alleged Edmonton police homicide Detective Mark Anstey.

Dexter, a program on the Showtime network, follows Dexter Morgan, who studies blood spatters for Miami police but leads a secret life as a serial killer, hacking up victims in the name of vigilante justice.

One recent comment on Mr. Twitchell's Facebook social networking site noted he “has way too much in common with Dexter.”

Wow!? Not since my induction into horror screenwriting, marked by a secret blood sabbath and ceremonial branding, have I seen anything more painful. Not only does this old chest-nut of blaming the usual triggers sell papers, but some actually believe it. The usual 'triggers' are blamed for someone with bad fucking wiring. In 1957 it was comic code, Rock and Roll in the 50s and 60s. Rap lyrics in the 90s and now video games, and today...Dexter. As always, the entertainment industry will see collateral damage. It's all done in the name of protecting children, but in reality it's just an insidious form of blaming something deeply troubled in an individual. While I'm sure it's true, he was obsessed with all these things, to blame a TV show is founded on ignorance, fear and dubious evidence.

Let me ask you, my fellow horrorphiles, what springs to mind when I use the word 'romance'? Knowing next to nothing about romance stories myself but full of prejudices anyway, my gut conjures up images of lurid Fabio muscles, heaving bosoms and Shatner-esque line delivery. It has hardly brought out the romantic in audiences and made them sex-starved. But another article bags to differ. This one in The Winnipeg Free Press:

Teen pregnancies tied to tastes for sexy TV shows
November 3rd, 2008
back
CHICAGO - Groundbreaking research suggests that pregnancy rates are much higher among teens who watch a lot of TV with sexual dialogue and behavior than among those who have tamer viewing tastes.

"Sex and the City," anyone? That was one of the shows used in the research. The new study is the first to link those viewing habits with teen pregnancy, said lead author Anita Chandra, a Rand Corp. behavioral scientist. Teens who watched the raciest shows were twice as likely to become pregnant over the next three years as those who watched few such programs.

Of course media is convenient. I'm curious to see these serial killer and sex-starved teens histories explored. Family influence (or lack of it), peer influence, inner emptiness, lack of a moral compass, economic background and histories of mental illness should be the first place to start. But for now, the entertainment industry will do. Until some journalists and 'experts' actually start REALLY exploring and actually dig further, all you can take from it is another sad case that will be forgotten in a few days. At least, until the trial where the same half-assed theories rear their ugly heads once again. Maybe it's a savage brain stew that involves all of the above. But, for me, some of us humans just aren't 'hooked-up right' and there's no figuring it out.

I think horror entertainment can empower us to endure the hardships of life, which we all face without exception, whether we be literature snobs, Trekkies, or devotees of bodice-rippers, monster-shlock, or Clue. And please do what the supposed experts cannot: take the time to separate the issues instead of lumping them together into bad journalism and histrionic jumble. Be sure to acquaint yourself with the players while your at it.

And in case your wondering and have trouble distinguishing between reality and fiction, that bit about ceremonial branding and blood sabbath was a lie based on a stereotype. Now, off on another draft of my horror script. And as one of my favourite authors, Hunter S. Thompson said, "Welcome to The New Dumb."

For other opinions go here.
And here.

Surveillance - international trailer

2008-11-02T12:37:00.000-08:00

A movie I loved working on with Jennifer Lynch...heck...all of the cast and crew. Check it out...Popout

The Canadian Feature Film Solution? (Part 3)

2008-11-01T12:37:00.000-07:00

Part three of three. Again, this article by John Harkness was first published in 1995, is a bit dated. But what it has to say is not. As usual, I have interjected with my own two-bits.

3. Federal and Provincial Governments Should Stop Funding Feature-Film Production

My fingers tremble as I process these words. I can’t believe that I’m about to say what I’m about to say. Well, God hates cowards.

The governments, federal and provincial, should stop funding feature-film production. The Canadian government has been pouring money into this financial dry hole for about a quarter of a century now, and exactly what have we gotten for the millions “invested” – a film “industry” that lies continually in intense care, tubes running in and out of its body, dozens of specialists running in and out of the room to monitor its pulse, blood pressure. It’s a Karen Anne Quinlin of a film industry that one one’s willing to pull the plug on.

I once spoke with a producer who had made films on both sides of the border, and he said to me that in the U.S. industry, to be successful as a producer, at some point one must satisfy an audience. It may be an audience plunking down $8 to see the movie in a theatre, it may be an audience renting a video for $3, it may be people turning into you movie when it shows up on television, but an audience must be satisfied or the film is a failure.

In Canada, he said, you never have to satisfy an audience. You have to satisfy Telefilm Canada, the Ontario Film Development Corporation, the CBC, the National Film Board of Canada.

That is, you have to satisfy a group of well-meaning, highly educated cultural bureaucrats. This means three or four things. It means that a filmmaker would be far likelier to get approval for a move that espouses whatever liberal cause is fashionable at the moment than for anything truly audacious, unsettling or interesting. I suspect that the entire career of the terminally tedious Anne Wheeler is based on the fact that she’s a “two-fer” – a woman director and a regional director in one package, fulfilling a big chunk of whatever unconscious quota system exists in the minds of the culture-crats. (and that system exists. A few years ago, I was talking to one of the principals in Deepa Mehta’s Sam and Me, who told they had a devil of a time getting funding because, someone at Telefilm Canada told them, Telefilm already had an Indian film that year.)

When something daring comes through the English-Canadian offices of Telefilm, like John Greyson’s Zero Patience or Srivinas Krishna’s Masala, one can bet that it is being funded not because it is daring, but because it fulfills some minority quotas.

Why does the government fund films? If the intent was to create a viable, working film industry that creates products that audiences want to see, then almost three decades of government funding has been an abject failure in English Canada. Good films have been made, but I would suggest that most of the best films have been made by people so obsessed with their visions that they would have been made whether the government funded them or not. People who need to make the films will make films, whether they get a grant or not. And people who are successful at making films that they have to make will continue to make them.

The government has never done the one thing essential to create a working film industry. It has never guaranteed Canadian films theatre space. How can we have a working film industry without control of the exhibition? On those occasions in the past three decades when the various federal government have made noises about quotas or box-office levies, Jack Valenti, Hollywood’s lobbyist/enforcer, has shown up and got the government to back down.

If the government really wants to create a viable film industry, they shouldn’t be funding production. They should build a theatre chain that would let people see Canadian films in an environment comparable to that in which they see Hollywood films. Perhaps 60 screens to start, and then match distributors dollar for dollar on promotion and advertising. Then we’d see if there’s any sort of market for Canadian films in Canada, rather than who is committed to getting grants, bridging loans and development money.

Here's where I differ, but times have changed since this article. I don't believe theatres are the answer anymore. Canada lost that battle in the 1930s when we sold our theatre chains to the U.S. (on a promise that Hollywood would make Canuck themed-pictures). DVD, BluRay and other formats are accounting for at least 60% of a features revenue anyway. Technology has opened up some opportunities. Even Hollywood films are not making enough dough at the theatre to cover their budgets or marketing expense. It is now treated as an expensive form of advertising dominated by 'tent-pole' $100 million to 200 million dollar movies.

And do I really want a Crown corporation involved in how my film is marketed? That's something filmmakers should be asking. Ask farmers how much they liked the Wheat Board running their business for them.

When it comes to concluding these three parts, a better writer than I has the best quote as to whybureaucracies like Telefilm and others exist. And as long as they exist in their present form, we can expect more of the same.

" A film is, in fact, only a courtesy under this system. It functions, as do the endless and proliferating committees of Government, as a repository of bureaucratic power. This power exists, and can exist, only in potential - for should the committee ever come to conclusions, its task, and so its operation as a bureaucratic fiefdom, would cease. So the bureaucrat, studio or otherwise, learns not only of the inadvisability of any test or completion but also of such conclusions absolute foolishness. This lesson, we see, was learned very well by the folks at Eron et al. - executives who saw power to grow wealthy stemmed from the brave decision to stop making anything at all."
- David Mamet (Bambi versus Godzilla)

Reproduced from the archives of Take One Magazine with permission.

Northernstars.ca Web

Copyright © 2007 northernstars.ca - All rights reserved.

The Canadian Feature Film Solution? (Part 2)

2008-10-31T12:36:00.000-07:00

Part two of three as we explore John Harkness' article. In his second 'modest proposal', he explores film festivals. My thoughts are at the end.

Three Modest Proposals for the Canadian Film "Industry"
By John Harkness, from Take One No. 7, Winter 1995

2. Stop Relying on Film Festivals

The idea has grown that the best way to launch one’s film is to get it properly positioned in a major Canadian film festival. At least two or three times a year, some poor neglected filmmaker complains that the selection committee at the Toronto International Film Festival’s Perspective Canada program has some personal or profound lack of taste that has led them to ignore said filmmaker’s magnum opus. They’ve done you a big favour.

It is actually a terrible idea to launch your film in English Canada at a film festival, for the following reasons:

Film festivals have evolved into a weird, self-contained exhibition circuit. It is almost possible for a filmmaker to spend a year or so trucking around the world, being stroked and interviewed at festivals from Cannes to Ouagadougou to Toronto to Sudbury to Vancouver to Delhi, from Tokyo to Telluride, from Park City in January to Havana in December. And what does the filmmaker get for all this, apart from a lot of frequent flyer miles and a certain exhaustion at the sound of his or her own voice and cosmic jet lag?

Not much – some festivals have a certain cachet in their own market – a prize at Cannes will help a film in Europe, though Jesus of Montreal tanked when it opened in Paris immediately after Cannes. But does a film’s presence in the Toronto festival add to its credibility or salability when it comes to getting into a Cineplex in Windsor? I doubt it, frankly. I suspect people outside the film-festival circuit are far less impressed by film festival honours than people inside the film-festival circuit.

But what about all the publicity? Let me show you that one looks from the point of view of someone who does the interviewing. A film gets launched at Cannes – Atom Egoyan’s The Adjuster, say, or David Wellington’s I Love a Man in Uniform. The Canadian press pays appropriate attention, talks about the film, interviews the filmmakers and/or stars, such as they are, and files stories home to a grateful public. For four months, nothing happens, and the film fades from memory because the public has had, afterall, no chance to see the film that they have heard about.

In September, the film gets a gala spot at Toronto, or a good spot in Perspective Canada, and the dog and pony show starts all over again. At this point, the papers do their profiles, the film has its gala, and then finally, a week, two weeks, three months, six months later, the film finally opens, with a small advertising budget and one screen in Toronto’s Carlton Cinemas or the smallest of the Cumberlands, and we in the press are offered the film one more time, at which point we are heartily sick of it. We are not your publicists. The distributors get shocked when we in the press don’t get all wet at the thought of putting together a big spread on a picture that we’ve already covered, sometimes twice. It has become, before opening, an old movie.

The desire to see one’s film play in a film festivals screws up the release schedules big time, with all the independent distributors trying to get their films out in the three weeks following the Toronto festival, at the exact moment when their natural audience is really tired from two weeks of film festivaling.

Finally, here’s something practical to think about. During the festival, people who really want to see the film will see the film – two shows in 300-seat theatre are 600 tickets, and no one penny of it returns to the film or its distributor. Do you help the film by giving away seats?

Makes sense to me. I've done the festival thing. Rejected by Toronto, but excepted in Montreal...and New York. I was so broke after making my production and going to festivals, that I had to borrow $20.00 for the airport fee in order to get back home. Next time out the gate, my plan is to tour with my next project (and hopefully my cast can come along because they have a stake in this as well). A punk-rock/garage band form of touring combined with the Internet and new media. Fold that in with good old fashioned leg-work will help connect with a Canadian public who has not a sniff about they're helping to finance. Nor getting to see it. If I'm going to go broke doing the festival 'fuck-off', why not do it on my own terms?

While festivals maybe a form of marketing, it's becoming prohibitive, political and inbred. Marketing is the key here, and in Harkness' next modest proposal, perhaps the most controversial of all, he discusses why the Canadian government should get out of funding production and get into helping with marketing.

Very interesting. The Rider game's on in an hour. Beer, football, food. Later.

After All the Broken Bones, The Riders Will be Playing in B.C.

2008-10-30T12:36:00.000-07:00

Here are my predictions for this weekend. I have shamefully neglected them, due to life and work circumstances. Here they are:

7:30 PM Thursday, October 30, 2008
Saskatchewan@Toronto

One team has everything to play for, the other, will be flogged in the off-season, both in terms of players and management. Michael Bishop will be a very pissed-off and motivated QB on Thursday night. He did not feel as though he should have been traded and will try to prove the Argonauts were dead wrong on that decision. A 12-6 season would be a major accomplishment. Frankly, I thought the Riders would go 9 and 9 this year after all the changes. Saskatchewan 29 Toronto 15

Final: Saskatchewan 45. Toronto 38. How does one explain this game. Besides the soul-sucking commentators and Skydome, I can only say that both defenses looked friggin' awful. Each team seemed to be deciding on who was more incompetent. I'm glad the Riders won, but ...wow...speechless.

9:00 PM Friday, October 31, 2008
Montreal@Edmonton

This is an important game for both teams because neither wants to enter the playoffs with two consecutive losses; Especially Edmonton. The 55-9 loss in Regina was similar to the 40-4 loss in Montreal back in Week 13. The Eskimos have allowed 512 points this year, and in my books is straddled with a lousy coach...second only to Doug Berry. The key to stopping or slowing down Montreal is not to concentrate on the quarterback, AnthonyCalvillo, but to play the receivers tough and force Calvillo to make difficult throws. More important for Edmonton to move into the playoffs with a win, but I doubt they'll get it. All year I've been saying Edmonton is over-rated, and they are. Montreal 36 Edmonton 27

Final: Edmonton 37. Montreal 14. Could I be more wrong on this? Montreal sat 6 starters, including Calvillo. An exhibition game for the most part. I wonder about first place finishers sitting starters? I can't recall in the past five years where that has helped in the East and West Finals.

2:00 PM Saturday, November 01, 2008
Hamilton@Winnipeg

At 7 wins and 11 losses it has not been a good year for the Bombers. But if they want to dominate Edmonton the way that Saskatchewan did they need another good game to enhance their confidence. Quinton Porter will be the number one QB come June of 2009. The Ticats will want this one to end as fast as possible. The Bombers are playing with a playoff purpose. Winnipeg 31 Hamilton 18

Final. Winnipeg 44. Hamilton 30. Off season for the Ti-Cats. Send Printers packing and get two better receivers and they're liable to make the playoffs next year. Winnipeg plays Edmonton in the East-Semi Final in the battle of poor coaching.

5:00 PM Saturday, November 01, 2008
B.C.@Calgary

It will be interesting to see how Stamps head coach John Hufnagel handles his players as compared to WallyBuono. I think that Buono plays everybody all game long. I think that Hufnagel gets a good half out of his key starters. BC should win this one because Calgary doesn't have any QB close to Henry Burris in ability...and he'll be pulled by half-time The last place that the Lions want to play a semi-final game is in Regina. The home of theRoughriders has the best fans in CFL football and their drunken/fist-fighting energy transfers to the players makes a difference. BC plays hard all game while Calgary plays it safe in the second half. BC 29 Calgary 24.

Again. Wrong about this one. Hufnagel actually got great performances out of his back-ups for the second half. Buck Peirce helped by throwing three stupid interceptions...and he looks hurt. Expect Jarious Jackson to start as BC travels into hostile Rider territory. Who would have thought?

The Riders will be heading to B.C. Place. I hate the idea, but that's what's going to happen. Your welcome and happy betting.

The Canadian Feature Film Solution? (Part 1)

2008-10-30T12:35:00.000-07:00

The following is part one of three. The article you are about to read was first published in 1995. I'm reassessing it because it seems just as relevant today, as did thirteen years ago (even though some of the film references are dated). I've put my two-bits in at the end. Why? Because it's my blog. If you want to read the article in it's entirety, go here. Anyway, here is Part One.

Three Modest Proposals for the Canadian Film "Industry"
By John Harkness, from Take One No. 7, Winter 1995

After looking at it for a long time, I’ve decided that Canadian cinema is just fine. We make exceptional films like Jesus of Montreal, Dead Ringers and 32 Short Films about Glenn Gould. We make interesting movies like Masala. We make deadly dull films like The Lotus Eaters and The Burning Season. In the long run, it doesn’t matter much what anyone says about the film industry, which will continue to lumber along, much as it has for the past decade or so.

Instead, I’ve decided to offer a series of proposals that I think would do the film business and the Canadian soul a world of good. They will do doubt be ignored. I prefer to think of myself as being ahead of the time.

1. Close All Film Schools for at Least Five Years

We have more filmmakers than we have projects for them to make, yet our film schools keep churning out little baby directors.

Jean Renoir, Kenji Mizoguchi, David Lean, John Ford, Howard Hawks, Orson Welles, Steven Spielberg, Federico Fellini, Billy Wilder, David Cronenberg – none of these people went to film school. More great films have been made by people who never saw the inside of a film school than by people with graduate degrees infilmmaking.

I also have considerable doubts about what they are being taught. A few years ago, a friend of mine was working for the Academy of Canadian Cinema on their director-observer program that took young filmmaking students and put them on the sets of actual, in-production films. During the course of interviewing the applicants, she discovered that an inordinate number of students wanted to be the next Patricia Rozema. The idea that there were dozens of little filmmaking students out there, waiting to unleash their version of White Room on the world steals my sleep.

But what, you ask, about people who really want to make films? How can we deprive them of an educational opportunity? People who really want to make films will make films. If they are truly driven to make films, they will find a way. Personally, I’m with the American writer Flannery O’Connor, who, when asked if he thought that university writing programs stifled writers, said that it didn’t stifle enough of them. The same thing is true of filmmakers.

Broadly speaking, universities have two objectives. The first is to develop an educated human being capable of thought and ready to contribute to the well being of society. The second is to g
give a person the necessary skills to make a living.

Canada’s best and most successful filmmakers tend to make a film every three years or so. Denys Arcnad, one of our most successful serious filmmakers, took four years to get from Jesus of Montreal to Love and Human Remains. Film schools give students all kinds of skills, then turns them loose on a world where they can scrape together bits of money to make films that will never be seen. Before she hit with I’ve Heard the Mermaids Singing, one could find Patricia Rozema’s name in the credits of one of those kiddie shows (either “The Elephant Show” or “Polka Dot Door”) as third assistant director. I once asked her what the third A.D. did on a show like this, and it turned out that she was basically a kid wrangler. For this you need to go to film school?

When I say film schools, I include the Canadian Film Centre, whose chief contributions to Canadian cinema was its first class, which gutted Canadian cinema of a generation’s worth of superb documentary filmmakers – Janice Cole, Brigitte Berman, Peter Raymont – who have produced damn little since their tour through NormanJewison’s École de Haute Schmooze. The Centre’s most prolific graduate following six years of existence is Gail Harvey, whose two films, The Shower (aptly described by the Toronto Star’s Norm Wilner as “No Exit stage byMolson’s”) and the “erotic thriller” Cold Sweat would be an embarrassment if anyone had seen them.

The American Film Institute program on which the Canadian Film Centre models itself works because there is a large and centralized film industry to absorb its graduates. The Canadian Film Centre has had almost 100 residents since its birth, and there is no industry in Canada capable of absorbing that many filmmakers, producers, writers and artistes.

I went to film school in Regina and Calgary. One was a University, the other a tech school. From a film school perspective, I guess that's balanced. I also did not take out a huge loan, only what I needed and had to work to pay the rest. What am I saying? Skip film school. And like Harkness' article, it's not that they are bad, it's what and who they are churning out. I know I might be pissing on people's dreams here, but if you want to work you need a skill a production can use when starting out.

First ADing paid my bills and allowed me to buy a house. Writing and Directing has not, but I'm making progress in these areas after 12 years. One can even make an argument that film school can never teach you to tell a story. You don't want to learn that from them anyway, or all you'll do is tell stories like everyone else. You learn to tell stories by telling stories. You learn by doing.

Film schools use a model that is Hollywood. They do not teach you how to make a movie when you have no money and no crew. They teach you how to make a big movie. Nothing wrong with thinking big, but get real. You'll make your first film with next to nothing.

It is true that you can make contacts. But that will only get you through the door, but it won't keep you there. You must have something concrete to offer. If I had to do it all over again, I'd take my hard-earned dough and make something of it. Grab a camera and some like-minded folks and make your movie/short/doc or animated film. You don't need permission from anyone or any institution to do that.

Next post will be an exploration of film festivals. Are they of any use and why are there so many of them? Mr. Harkness has some interesting ideas about that as well.

Later.

Beef and Glory Holes

2008-10-28T12:30:00.000-07:00

"The difference between the right word and the almost right word...is the difference between lightning bug and lightning." Mark Twain said that, so let me clarify a few things about my previous entry 'Killjoys and Dog Shit". I was disappointed with the WORDS in the headline, "Gross's Passion No Porky's" in the October 21, 2008 print edition of the Globe and Mail. It seemed mean-spirited by design. Not the sort of stuff I expect nor desire from my choice of national newspaper that claims to be Canada's best...if by the best, we mean Central Canada.

Let's get one thing straight. I'm not blindly endorsing Paul Gross's "Passchendaele". I'm not saying anyone should not criticize a movie because it's Canadian. I'm not saying 'go to a Canadian movie because it's good for you, just like eating your veggies.' I DID state in my previous entry, that if a movie is crap, it's crap. My beef is with the article, it's wording and the pissy attitude at The Globe. By the end of James Adams's article, I was confused. Why? Because "Passchendaele" is not an 80's relic like Porky's? "Passchendaele" is not seeking the same audience as those who vend films for beer-swilling University boys who find sticking their dicks through holes in the shower wall as a source of amusement.

What have we learned from this article? That apples are not oranges? With logic like that, I look forward to The Globe's future article on why Canadian beef is not apple pie, and therefore fails to be worth eating.

If you'd like to see another opinion, go to Jim Henshaw's blogpot.

Now, for the down-side. Money. "Passchendaele" will most certainly have huge problems making it's money back, and most likely will not. Not ever. That makes it a failure, something that should not be rewarded. Unfortunately, we keep rewarding film and television failure in this country. In Mr. Henshaw's blog, he blamesTelefilm for this veil of tears, and I'm inclined to agree.

He has four rules to improve Telefilm. Here they are, with my own two-bits to improve those rules:

Rule One: Anybody who wants to make a movie gets $100,000 from Telefilm. No track records. No rigid application dates. No binders of support material. You got an idea you get 100 grand and one year to make your movie. Telefilm keeps the same budget so when that many hundred grands are gone, the wicket is closed.

You'll need a script and a budget, to show where you are spending the money. No mystery 'juries' assessing a project's merits. If Telefilm wants to behave like a 'studio', then it must make decisions and stop trying to be everything to everyone. Also, if Telefilm continues to back failures, then we have a personnel problem, and people are let go...free to pursue other opportunities. This should not be run like a social safety-net.

Rule Two: You don't make your movie you have to pay the money back and you never get to apply for anything ever again.

Can't improve on that.

Rule Three: You make your movie but it can't get released or doesn't earn its money back, you get to put your name in the hat for a bonus draw of the final hundred grand envelope next year. Hey, it's showbiz, not everything is going to work, but we're also not here just to keep your doors open anymore.

A lottery may not be the best answer, but at least gets rid of the regional bickering and the same faces getting dough to put out another failure.

Rule Four: You make your movie and it makes money. You automatically get $500,000 to make another one. If that one makes money, you get a million the next time around and so on.

Sounds fair. Rewarding success. And that's what it should be about. "Passchendaele" has story problems. It was expensive to make. It's Paul Gross' second kick at the can and there shouldn't be any more if this movie does not make money. But kicking sand at it before it's done it's run, by a newspaper that already had it's chance at a review? That's bullshit.

Killjoys and Dog Shit.

2008-10-26T12:30:00.000-07:00

" Sometimes it appears to me that Canada, even an intact Canada, is not so much a country as a continental suburb, where Little Leaguers govern ineffectually, desperate for American approval"
- Mordecai Richler

You can debate the above quote, but I would most certainly put the Canadian media in that category, especially this week.
Here is an article that appeared in the Globe and Mail this week. Monday, Oct. 20th to exact.

PASSCHENDAELE
Gross's passion no Porky's

JAMES ADAMS

October 20, 2008

Actor-director Paul Gross's First World War epic Passchendaele failed to notch a breakout hit for Canadian film at the box office this weekend. The movie was the second highest-grossing film in Canada on the weekend, earning an estimated $940,000 from its debut on 202 Canadian screens, according to its distributor Alliance Films. The movie had a budget of approximately $20-million as well as at least a $2-million marketing budget.

Howard Lichtman, the veteran Toronto-based box-office analyst, said Passchendaele's performance wasn't "an unmitigated success ... but in perspective it did just fine," since it's aimed at an older audience and is being released in the fall, traditionally a time for either "art films" or "adult-oriented fare."

"Is it a commercial blockbuster like a Quantum ofSolace [the new James Bond film opening Nov. 14]? It's not - but I don't think it was intended to be," Lichtman noted. "If you take the just-under million dollars it generated and divide that by the average ticket price, there's still an awful lot of people that went to see a Canadian piece of history. Which isn't too bad."

"We're thrilled with the box-office," said Carrie Wolfe, Alliance vice-president of marketing, publicity and promotion, yesterday in Toronto. "Canadians across the country have embraced the film," which opened this year's Toronto International Film Festival.
Print Edition - Section Front

Passchendaelewas bested for top spot by Max Payne, a new Mark Wahlberg action vehicle shot mostly in Toronto earlier this year. No specific Canadian weekend gross was available yesterday for Payne but Box OfficeMojo estimated its North American receipts were $18-million (U.S.) from a total of 3,376 screens. Using whatLichtman calls "the 10-times factor" - that is, movies in the U.S. tend to have, on average, 10 times the box-office of Canadian releases - then it's likely Max Payne opened on 250-300 screens in Canada and earned $1.5-$1.8-million here.

It appears Passchendaele isn't en route to surpass Porky's (1982) or 2006's Bon Cop, Bad Cop as a Canadian box-office champion. (Porky's earned more than $11-million in theatrical receipts, while Bon Cop's take was more than $11.5-million.)

Nor is it likely to best Men with Brooms which Gross also directed, co-wrote and starred in. That comedy, budgeted at $7.5-million, played on 207 screens on its opening weekend in the winter of 2002 and earned $1.125-million. Its eventual total take from its theatrical release was $3.9-million.

Lichtman, however, said a film's performance needs to be evaluated in terms of its release date and its competition. He suggested the more apt comparison for Passchendaele should be with W., Oliver Stone's biopic of the current U.S. president. W grossed $10.6-million on slightly more than 2,000 screens. "It's right in the range [of the 10-times factor]," said Lichtman, meaning W.'s weekend box-office in Canada probably totalled about $1-million from approximately 210 screens - very close to that of Passchendaele.
Now if this isn't a supremely asshole thing to do. A Canadian movie breaks box office records in it's OPENING WEEKEND, and the headline is negative and goes on to compare it to American product. And it's compared to a teen sex-comedy when it's aiming at a different audience. If this isn't Little League thinking by the entertainment desk at the Globe and Mail, I don't what is. Instead of celebrating our culture, the donkey who writes this article decides to put a negative spin on it, after all...negative sells to the public. Right?
The headline could have read: 'Passchendaele beats W. at the box office! Passchendaele BEATS dog movie at box office! Now let's be clear. I don't like blind patriotism, nor should you like any show because it's Canadian. If it's crap, it's crap. But publishing facts and statistics like box office and giving it a negative spin like a review is bullshit.
Here is another example of Little Leaguers at work, this time in the National Post:
'Between exotic and obscure': The Office comes to Winnipeg (via LA)
Posted: October 25, 2008, 9:42 AM by Brad Frenette

Winnipeg is about to get a star turn on an upcoming episode of The Office when Michael Scott (Steve Carrell) goes on a business trip to the capital of Manitoba.

With budget constraints in mind, the show decided that instead of shooting on location, they would recreate the city in their Los Angeles studio. According to CP, the show's writers chose the 'Peg "because it struck the right balance 'between exotic and obscure.'"

To help make things more authentic, Lori Walder of Destination Winnipeg sent shipments of Winnipeg curiosities to the producers of the show in L.A., including a variety of Old Dutch chips and beer from Winnipeg brewer Fort Garry.

Walder told CP that she doesn't think the city will become the butt of the jokes: "I don't think that's the humour of The Office... It's really about the characters ... I would be very surprised if the joke is on Winnipeg. I think it's more on Michael."

Manitoba Premier Gary Doer, however, doesn't think that remaking Winnipeg makes a fair substitute for the real place: "We want the real deal. We're real people. We want reality actors here not virtual actors."

The last U.S. TV show to visit Winnipeg was The Simpsons. The show's plot saw Homer visiting the city in search of cheap prescription drugs.

The Winnipeg episode of The Office is scheduled to air November 13 on Global.
This is a friggin' NEWS STORY?! Denis McGrath does a fine job of displaying his displeasure on his blog Dead Things on a Stick, which you can find in the sidebar. Like him, I find this sad and embarrassing. The Canuckmedia only writes a story when Americans notice us. Meanwhile, there is a wicked, funny series called 'Less Than Kind' that shoots in Winnipeg. It employs Canadian cast and crew. And get this...it's actually set and shot here! Oh yeah, and the film 'My Winnipeg' by Guy Maddin played here for FOUR WEEKS...in theatres. That's worth celebrating and covering.

I know what your thinking. Cunningham, why so angry about this? Well, after a year with Bill C-10, arts and culture wars and cutting, I'm feeling a bit savage. Our national media is doing no better than Harper, they are feeding the bears who think Canuck entertainment is not worthwhile.

In a recent poll during the election, 60% of Canadians felt that arts and culture are worth supporting. To me that's not good enough. Those of use who work in the cultural industries have a lot of work to do in educating the public about what we do. And these kind of articles undermine the work.
To make sure Canadians remain Canadian, we rely on rules. We threaten legislation to keep American football out. We enact laws to promote Canadian music and give Canadian magazines (and newspapers) a leg up. We tie film and book publishing funds to Canadian content. We set up massive bureaucracy to ensure that Canada gets its fair share of the television and cable world. We establish foreign ownership controls to keep our communications and arts industries away from outside clutches.

And then, having duly protected ourselves from the rest of the world, we sit back and read British mysteries, rentHollywood movies, watch American TV shows, read New York magazine, listen to rock music from London and country music from Nashville on devices manufactured in Asia.
Anyway. Back to Passchendeale. It is something to celebrate, no matter what you might think of the movie. Because, if it succeeds, all of us in this threatened industry succeed. Get it? It's like the first snow. It's clean and pretty for the first twenty minutes around dawn, but after that it's churned into filthy mush by garbage trucks and shitting dogs. And journalists, this week, and in my books, were the shitting dogs. Hopefully they rise above low-rent gibberish. There is something to celebrate here!

Phantom of the Paradise

2008-10-19T12:29:00.000-07:00

Go on. Ask. Everyone does. Why the hell do you love this movie Cunningham? Well, I'm not alone and I have just discovered that my new city of residence loves it too.

Phantom-mania gripped Winnipeg in 1975. "Why was Phantom of the Paradise such a big hit--only in Winnipeg?

"Why Winnipeg?!"

The short answer is: nobody knows! But something definitely happened in Winnipeg that didn't happen in any other city in North America*: it fell in love with Brian De Palma's 1974 comedy-horror-musical-tragedy Phantom of the Paradise. Interviewed at the time, a booking executive for Phantom's Canadian distributor stated: "It is incredible how well the picture has done here, but it only happened in Winnipeg, nowhere else. In Vancouver, the film lasted only one week; it went a week in Calgary, only a week in Edmonton and then people stopped coming. But in Winnipeg they just never stopped!"

How a movie could become a hit in complete isolation from the rest of civilization is a phenomenon unique in modern entertainment, yet Winnipeggers gave this movie its only "legs"...and kept them standing for four and a half months over the winter and spring of 1975. The city also snapped up the official soundtrack album in record numbers, buying over 20,000 copies (and contributing in large part to its official gold status in Canada), and made a "Beatle" out of songwriter and Phantom star Paul Williams for one magical day that June.

Why Phantom caught on only in Winnipeg is a mystery for the ages, but as far as anyone knows, there was no poisoning of the Shoal Lake water supply with hallucinogenic drugs, nor any other factor to which its singular success here can be attributed. However, if my eyes can be trusted, the median age of those who attendedPhantompalooza events in 2005 and 2006 was around 40, suggesting that most of Phantom's Winnipeg audience was around 10 back in 1975...MUCH younger than the young adult audience 20th-Century Fox had targeted with their misguided marketing efforts. In other words, this was a very specific demographic: old enough to get away from their parents and into a movie with a Mature rating, but not old enough to be jaded by the film'sfaux glam rock when the real thing could be had with almost any concert ticket. In other words, its mix of music and mayhem made it a relatively safe alternative to attending the KISS and Alice Cooper shows that were still the exclusive domain of older siblings.

But the seeds were here all along for something like this to happen. The forties and fifties saw a renaissance in our arts scene, culminating in international renown for the ballet and symphony. In the sixties, Winnipeg response to the British invasion framed rock and roll not as a source of fear, but rather, immense pride over the ground-breaking success of Winnipeg artists like The Guess Who and Neil Young. And thanks to a perfect storm of federal (1967), provincial (1970) and municipal (1974) centenaries, funding flowed like manna from all three levels of government; when the dust settled, Winnipeg had shiny new arts facilities, including a concert hall, museum, art gallery, theatre centre and planetarium. This sudden concentration of artistic endeavours, combined with relative isolation both within the province and on the continent, meant that it was much easier to realize a cultural tipping point in Winnipeg, a vast city-state not that concerned with looking over our shoulder at Toronto, or Vancouver, or Minneapolis when Winnipeg it's own vibrant and eccentric scene to enjoy.

There are clearly three components to Winnipeg's Phantom-mania: 1) the movie itself, 2) the Paul Williams concert of June 1975, and 3) the movie's post-concert resurrection, which made it seem as if it played on local screens for well over a year.

Find those rare, strange copies where you can! Then, grab a popcorn, and take off your toque. Get comfy and relish the wonderful weirdo that is Phantom of the Paradise.

Hydro Levesque and a Suicidal Winnipeg

2008-10-14T12:28:00.000-07:00

Recently, Friday night to be exact, I went to a screening of 'Hydro-Lévesque' by filmmaker/artist Matthew Rankin

Here's the synopsis:

On the night of René Lévesque's sovereigntist victory in 1976, a deaf-mute Catholic nun is drawn away from the jubilation by a paranormal cry for help from Winnipeg. Leaving her happy nation behind, the compassionate sister ventures forth to discover a crazed and inconsolable Winnipeg, festering on the brink of mass suicide. Weaving the intricate symbolism of Québec cinema into the degraded abstractions of Winnipeg, Hydro-Lévesque is a loving and emotional Québec nationalist film about Winnipeg's self-destructive urge.

It won the* Special Jury Prize, WNDX 2008 *

The sixteen short minutes of this black and white film made me laugh, think and feel more than any show I've witnessed by Canadian film and television makers (with many times the money and resources) recently. Levesque and Trudeau's ghosts appearing in swirling masses of smoke to the protagonist are fevered. If you come across this wonderful piece of work in your town, seek it out.

Matthew Rankin is part of a group called Atelier - National du Manitoba. You can read more here.

It was a wonderful, inspiring introduction to Winnipeg's film making community, and look forward to more.

The New Hitching Post.

2008-10-12T12:28:00.000-07:00

" Who is this that darkeneth counsel by words without knowledge?"
- Job 38:2

Who indeed? What kind of irresponsible bastard would do a thing like that? Poor Job must have been thinking about journalists when he uttered those words. They definitely laid some dark and ignorant counsel on him, and he suffered badly because of it...boils, madness, many deaths in the family. Job's affliction could be the only explanation for Gina Mallet's article in the National Post, reproduced here...with my two-bits:

Canada's culture sham

Gina Mallet, National Post Published: Monday, October 06, 2008

I pray that nobody tries to institutionalize Canadian food. Canadian chefs are doing just fine in their own restaurants. Please, please don't call for subsidies for Cancon food.

Oh? Maple Leaf Foods? Maybe I'm wrong, but government Health inspectors stepping in was...well...probably good? Odd analogy, but I guess that's to be expected from a cookbook writer and 'food' critic. But hey! Let's move along here.

Because you'll end up in the same mess that the arts have been in ever since I first came to Toronto. And theCancons are at it again, moaning that Stephen Harper isn't giving them enough money.

We don't want more money, just stop cutting it.

I think he's right.

Why? Because it's a sham.

I don't mean Canada doesn't have fine artists, actors, musicians, writers. Of course it does. But that isn't enough. Canada must have a national cultural presence, a national theatre and opera and ballet and cinema. It isn't enough to enjoy the artists we have, we must have institutions.

I don't like institutions either. I'll admit it, you've got me hooked sweet heart! I'll forgive the back-handed compliment from a failed theatre critic. Oh shit, just did the back-handed thing myself! Sorry. Forgive me.

And institutions are costly political boondoggles, full of hot air and signifying nothing. As well, very often Canadians are shafted by the institutions that taxpayers are supporting.

Oh, Lord above! I agree! Add triple-dipping broadcasters who get subsidies and protection to that list.

Let me give an example about institutional indifference to the Canadian artist.

I'm ready. Sock it to me!

Telefilm is a Crown Corporation, the government's film institution which hands out almost $10-million a year to Canadian produced films.

Recently I caught the 2004 flick Being Julia on late night TV. It was produced by Canadian Robert Lantos, starred American Annette Bening and Brits Jeremy Irons and Michael Gambon and was directed by HungarianIstvan Szabo. The film was based on Somerset Maugham's novella Theatre; the script was written by Brit Ronald Harwood; the film was shot at locations in Europe. It was financed by Canada, Britain and Hungary.Telefilm contributed around $7-million to the $18-million budget (and $3-million more for promotion.

Being Julia is so bad that I couldn't even laugh at it. But quite aside from its quality, the film has nothing whatsoever to do with being Canadian -- with the exception of a two-second glimpse of Sheila McCarthy.

Well, it wasn't my cup-o-tea either, but didn't it get Oscar nominations? Small, thing, but let's move on...

Telefilm doesn't want to spend taxpayers' money on real Canadian films which may be glum and unsophisticated; it wants to be a Hollywood player.

Really? Most Canadian films and TV shows are pretty funny? Corner Gas, Trailer Park Boys, FUBAR etc. Minor point.

But when it comes to films like Being Julia, Canadian taxpayers can see through the charade. The movie's box office take was $1-million in Canada and a total of $14-million elsewhere). I bet a low-budget flick about the sound of waves crashing on the Rock could make as much proportionately.

I wish! I'd be applying for a grant right now, but the paperwork out-weighs the weak 'crashing Rock 'concept. Sorry Gina, don't buy that one. Maybe you could apply...your idea anyhow.

Yes Mr. Harper, it's time to pull the plug.

Maybe he will.

When times get weird and madness starts closing in the form of bad, ill-informed journalism, I always turn to the Bible. I was brought up on it out here on the prairies. Some of my earliest memories hark back to hot mornings when I was young and my grandfather used to lash me to the hitching post with strips of rawhide and order the field-help to throw handfuls of sharp gravel at me while he read from the Good Book. He identified very stronglywith Job. And from now on, I'll refer to The National Post to the 'Hitching Post'. They just keep spreading the good word. Maybe Gina can read to me from her cookbook next time she ties me and my rotten, sinful kind to the post.

Blood Clots in the Revenue Stream

2008-10-09T12:25:00.000-07:00

I have just finished moving to Winnipeg, hemorrhaging money along the Trans-Canada in the forms of a mortgage, moving and other costs associated with lawyers, banks and insurance folks(my three favourite kind of people). I have left a city I have called my home for most of my life. I've had most of my childhood and career in Regina, Saskatchewan. Now that the heavy-lifting and unpacking is finished, it is interesting how the media and politicians are stirring-up a shit-storm of panic. Canadians are sweating bullets over their financial and work futures. I say 'interesting' because thisuncertainty is how I have lived my life for the past 41 years. It most certainly is how I have lived my life in the film and television industry.

So Canada, welcome to my world. Should you panic over something that may or may not happen? That's up to you. Jim Henshaw states it well on his blog, Legion of Decency:

This was a tough week for a lot of people. The financial meltdown on Wall Street turned many Billionaires into mere Millionaires and scores more who thought they had a future (or maybe a house) into folks wondering if they'll ever work again or how much of their stuff can fit in a grocery cart. If you read the papers -- or more correctly, if you BELIEVE what you read in the papers, we'll shortly be unable to afford retirement, shelter, transportation or food. In other words, the entire world will become a Canadian Artist. From a media perspective, it's fortunate the collapse of Capitalism-as-we-know-it came along when it did. After a couple of years of Global Warming scenarios in which we were all drowned by melting ice caps, wiped out by unleashed tropical diseases or felled by methane released from the thawing tundra, we still hadn't panicked en mass. So now they get to cook up a whole new series of Post-Apocalyptic scenarios people wouldn't buy in a Roger Corman movie, but which apparently sell newspapers.

Yep, The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse are coming. I suggest you all read the Book of Revelations, if you are end-of-the world inclined. The language is poetic and the imagery is inspiring enough to produce heart attacks.

Me? I love my new home, new city and have a sense of hope. Could it all fall apart tomorrow? Sure. But when was life certain? Ever? My life in the 'arts' has been the polar opposite of safe, but I am proud of it. I would do it all over again without changing a beat, although I have never recommended it to others. That would be irresponsible and wrong, I think, and I am none of those things.

And here is another small ray of hope...

Harper scraps controversial clause in Bill C-10

Tory Leader says government is considering the 'serious concerns that have been expressed by film creators and investors'

GAYLE MACDONALD

With a report from James Bradshaw

October 8, 2008

Canadian artists scored a victory yesterday after Stephen Harper abruptly pulled the plug on a controversial clause in Bill C-10 that would have allowed Ottawa to block tax credits for film and television projects it found morally offensive.

The Conservative Leader's about-face comes as Tory hopes of a majority fade, and support for the party is sagging in the crucial battlegrounds of Quebec and Ontario.

The move appears to be aimed at appeasing voters incensed at the provision in C-10, and at the nearly $45-million in recent cuts to a swath of other arts and culture programs. Reaction yesterday from some of the most influential voices in Canada's cultural sector was swift.

"It's the first arts cut that he's made that's actually good," said director David Cronenberg. "It's obvious he thought he was playing to a major constituency when he was talking about the cultural elites and the rich galas, and all that nonsense. He realized there are a lot of people of every so-called 'class' - working or middle class - who depend on their arts for their livelihood and for their intellectual well-being.
The Globe and Mail

"He tried to play the dumb-it-down game and it didn't work because Canadians are not dumb."

Mr. Cronenberg was referencing comments made by Mr. Harper at a recent campaign stop in Saskatoon, where he said he did not believe that "ordinary working people" were sympathetic to "a bunch of people, you know, at a rich gala all subsidized by taxpayers claiming their subsidies aren't high enough."

Reached at the Vancouver International Film Festival, director Atom Egoyan said he felt "relief."

"Now we're waiting for other reversals of decisions," he said. "I think our message might be getting across. And that's great news."

The incendiary clause in C-10, as well as the $45-million in other cuts, has galvanized the arts community, sparking rallies and news conferences across the country. Many critics have charged the cuts were ideologically motivated by the Conservative government.

But Mr. Harper and his officials have repeatedly maintained they were simply implementing necessary reviews designed to identify inefficient or ineffective initiatives.

Actor, writer and director Sarah Polley said yesterday: "It's good news that this ridiculous clause has been thrown out, but it's only a start and doesn't negate the harm this government has caused to culture in this country."

The C-10 hoopla first reared its head in February after The Globe and Mail reported there was a little-known provision - at third reading before the Senate banking committee - that could cut off tax benefits for film and TV productions that contain graphic sex, violence or other content that the government finds offensive. It applied only to Canadian TV and film projects, while Hollywood and other foreign productions applying for tax credits would get a free pass.

Yesterday in his platform - called The True North Strong and Free: Stephen Harper's Plan for Canadians - the Tory Leader said that while "these proposals were approved unanimously by the House of Commons, we will take into account the serious concerns that have been expressed by film creators and investors.

"A re-elected Conservative government ... will maintain financial support for arts and culture at or above existing levels, while continuing to improve the effectiveness of allocations wherever possible."

All four opposition parties have pledged to reinstate the $45-million in axed programs.

Now, back to work on my screenplay.

Soul Coughing - Screenwriter's Blues

2008-09-30T12:24:00.000-07:00

This is in response to Will Dixon's post. I dig this tune, especially this year. It's Chandler....it's Kerouac...it's a place that is not really there, but it exists in your mind. A place you try to find and express it. Also...I often get the most inspired when driving on highways...

Lyrics:

Exits to freeways twisted like knots on the fingers...
Jewels, cleaving skin between - breasts.

Your Cadillac breathes 400 horses between blue lines.
You are going to Ricida to make love to a model from Ohio
whose real name you don't know.
You spin, like the Cadillac was overturning down a cliff,
on television...
And the radio is on, and the radio man is speaking,
and the radio man says "women were a curse"
So men built Paramount, studios...
and men built Columbia, studios...
and men built, Los Angeles.
It is 5 am, and you are listening, to Los Angeles.

And the radio man says "it is a beautiful night out there"
And the radio man says "Rock and Roll lives!"
And the radio man says it is a beautiful night out there
in Los Angeles.
You live in Los Angeles, and you are going to Ricida
We are all in some way or another going to Ricida
Some day, to die...
And the radio man laughs, because the radio man fucks a model too.

Gone savage, for teenagers with automatic weapons and boundless love.
Gone savage for teenagers who are esthetically pleasing,
in other words "FLY"
Los Angeles beckons the teenagers to come to her on buses.
Los Angeles loves, love...
It is 5 am, and you are listening, to Los Angeles...

I am going to Los Angeles to build a screenplay
about lovers who murder each other.
I am going to Los Angeles to see my own name on a Screen
Five feet long, and luminous.
As the radio man says, "it is 5 am,
and the sun has charred the other side of the world
and come back to us,
and painted the smoke over our heads and imperial Violet!
It is 5 am! And you are listening...to Los Angeles"
You are listening...
You are listening...
To Los Angeles.

Popout

River.

2008-09-29T12:24:00.000-07:00

Here is a small movie called 'River' by Mark Wihak. Check it out. I found it inspiring, and hopeful after a week of bashing artists in the always mean-spirited political sphere. The story revolves around two 'ordinary' people trying to connect and find art in the everyday.

Simply wonderful. And if it doesn't inspire you to go out and make your own project, shame on you.

Roughriders Will Be Savaged and Other CFL Predictions.

2008-09-27T12:24:00.000-07:00

Hey, the weekend is coming, and it's time for sports. Specifically, Canadian Football. Let's face it: the only true blood sport in this country is politics. You can dabble in sports, but when you start lusting for power or a majority government, the joke is over. Politicians are the real gamblers and there is nothing they won't do to win. Nothing involving jockstraps or sports bras will ever come close to it for drama, savagery and the lust for the spoils of victory. Unless you attend a Rider game and sit on the East-side after fourteen hours of tail-gating and drinking. With that, on to my CFL predictions for the weekend:

Edmonton (7-5) at Winnipeg (4-8)
The Bombers have won two weeks in a row but this week's opponent isn't just another Eastern dog like Toronto or Hamilton. Edmonton shit-the-bed last week in Montreal, a game head coach Danny Maciocia called the worst in his three-plus seasons leading the Eskimos. Well, he should know, he's the worst 'still-employed' coach in theCFL. After a terrible start, Winnipeg seems to be getting its act together behind quarterback Kevin Glenn, who's coming off back-to-back 300-yards-plus passing games. The always rabid Coach Berry will have whipped his troops into shape for this one. Winnipeg is not as bad as their record suggests, and Edmonton is not as good as theirs.
Prediction: Winnipeg by 6.
Final: Winnipeg 30 Edmonton 23
TOMORROW
Calgary (8-4) at Toronto (4-8)
It's the rematch of the 34-4 debacle last week in Calgary where the Argos were a disgusting embarrassment. Toronto and Calgary are two teams headed in polar opposite directions. And while Toronto head coach Don Matthews has learned a lot about his team, the talent gap between these two is too large. Quarterbacks Kerry Joseph and Cody Pickett could share duties against the Stamps. Sound familiar? When Toronto's season is over, Matthews is likely to relapse into his anxiety disorder and burn the house down. Which is not a bad thing, a cleansing fire just might be what the lumberjack ordered. Deadwood and over-paid duds will be gone and the Argos can commence to starting over...if they haven't already.
Prediction: Calgary by 13.
Final: Calgary 44 Toronto 16
Hamilton (2-10) at B.C. (7-5)
The Hamilton Tiger-Cats can't buy a break, but they bought Kenton Keith this week. They also bought Casey Printers for $500,000 and look how that turned out. Three of the past four weeks they've had wins on a plate and let them slip away with dumb mistakes and weak coaching. The lone exception was a loss against B.C. that turned out to be former head coach Charlie Taaffe's last game. No team from the Eastern time zone has won in Vancouver since the Cats did during the opening week of 2004 — former coach Greg Marshall's first game. Remember him? Rookie quarterback Quinton Porter has his work cut out for him in his first CFL start. Shivers made a wily and calculated move by stating that Keith is "...an insecure young man...who always needs assurance." And Shivers is considered a friend by Keith. With friends like that, Keith should punt Shivers and tell the man to head back to Vegas. I knew there was a reason I liked Shivers. If Keith can stay out of the nightclubs, he might succeed in Hamilton.
Prediction: B.C by 7.
Final: B.C 40 Hamilton 10
SUNDAY
Saskatchewan (8-4) at Montreal (8-4)
Oh man, it does my black little heart no good to write this. The Roughriders, losers of two in a row and four of six, are suddenly in the thick of a dog-fight in the West Division. And while reaching the playoffs isn't a question, hosting a home playoff game is. Michael Bishop gets his fourth consecutive start against a Montreal team that iscake walking to the host's chair for the Eastern final. For Montreal, the worm has turned and they are coming to life like sunning rock lizards. Montreal will be a nasty golden snake with many arms and legs. My beloved Riders' injuries are finally catching up to them and the horseshoe that has been up their asses has finally fallen out.
Prediction: Montreal by 12.
Final: Montreal 37 Saskatchewan 12
Well, that's it in a nutshell. I have a feeling that the B.C/Hamilton game will be the most fun to watch. Happy gambling.

Conclusion: My predictions were correct, but point-spread was off. And the most entertaining game was the Bombers and Eskimos. The rest? Dismal, boring blow-outs. I'll do better next time...honest.

From My Ivory Tower.

2008-09-26T12:23:00.000-07:00

Here I sit, looking down upon all of you...an artist in my ivory tower surrounded by elites. I'll just pour myself a martini, then we can get on with our little talk. One last time, I'll go over this, then it's off to another gala. And all this political trash-talk is putting my head in a foul space. And when I get a foul-head, my servants get nervous.

"You know, I think when ordinary working people come home, turn on the tvand see a gala of a bunch of people, you know, at a rich gala, all subsidized by the taxpayers, claiming their subsidies aren’t high enough when they know the subsidies have actually gone up, I’m not sure that’s something that resonates with ordinary people. Ordinary people understand we have to live within a budget. We have increased culture. We haven’t increased anybody’s budget without limit, so we’re not going to do this. I think this is a niche issue for some, but that’s my view..."
Which, moments later, produced the following question, asked (and answered) in French:

Good afternoon, Mr. Harper. I was listening to you speak English earlier, and you said that artists do not attract much pity, when they wear long gowns at gala evenings. Could you perhaps repeat what you said in French, and do you believe that artists are spoiled, Mr. Harper?
HARPER: It’s always a mistake, I think, to generalize about any group...

Well, no shit my fine friend, but that didn't stop you from doing it. Especially when counting on Francophone voters, some of whom may take great pride in seeing Quebec artists celebrated by their peers - provincial, national and international - even when it happens at a “rich gala”. Bad move in Quebec, where there are seats on the cusp of victory or defeat. There goes a majority, God-Damn it!
Shit, I spilled my drink in all the excitement! Next, Harper, my friend, call me before you speak about the arts.
The rest of Harper’s response, during which he fails to answer the question about whether he believes artists are “spoiled”. He never repeated what he said in French. I think he realized quickly that he said something that would set-off a shit storm. And it did. For the next two days anyway, by Saturday it will be forgotten. no harm, no foul. Canadians quickly forget and a new 'niche' issue will rear it's head.
After the October 14th Election and $240,000,000 of taxpayers money has been flushed down the toilet on anunnecessary exercise, Canadians will settle in for the winter and the coming Christmas season...which I think starts Nov 1 in the fleecing and retail markets? Correct me if I'm wrong. People will be happy again, arms full ofiPods, iPhones, TVs, new computers and shouting like Tiny Tim, " God Bless Us, Every One!" All of it destined for future garage sales. All will be forgiven, because that's what Christmas is about.
Okay, okay. That's enough about Christmas, it's too early for that. Let's get to the Stock Market and the coming 'Crash'. There will be a definite shrinkage of the money supply, and that is always bad news for the 'disposable income' crowd. Lifestyles will be greatly diminished and half the people you know will declare bankruptcy or turn to prostitution for rent money and mortgages. This is what they mean by 'crash'.
Life will get meaner, especially with Harper leading the charge. The crime rate will skyrocket, especially by 14 year olds. Your home will be burglarized and you will suspect your neighbors, or worse, gangs of roving artists. Sales of canned dog food will go through the roof!
Whoops! I've got to get a grip on myself. This is supposed to be a harmless little blog?! And what am I thinking? Oil and gas will save us from that fate...right?
Okay, I told you I was in a foul head space - so I'll save that riff on off-duty cops working as armed debt collectors for later. The weekend's coming, and that means football. I'll make my predictions tomorrow. Hey! I should invite Harper over to watch a Rider game. Might smooth some things over...have a guy-talk, that sort of thing. I can remind him that sports is part of culture and all that. I just hope he doesn't think CFL players are over-paid and spoiled. Come to think of it, I better not invite him. He might say something he'll regret.
God Bless Us, Every One!

I'm an Elitist Who Loves Glitzy Affairs and Whores.

2008-09-25T12:23:00.000-07:00

Hi there. Grab a stool, open your beer. I have something to get off my chest. Ya...I'm talking to you buddy. Let's start....

Hate politics? Yeah...me too. But, it should be pointed out that Stephen Harper is a disliked Prime Minister, much in the same way Brain Mulroney was, but that won't stop him from being re-elected. And it's not just a Canadian practice...look south and Google...Nixon. Harper's leadership capabilities still register around 20% and the country will elect a party that has less than a 40% vote. Much like Nixon in the height of his powers. But that's Canada. Monkey-see, monkey-do...a term I've heard from the media elite about the ALL the politicians. But that's another story and frankly, I hate the media.

Hey! You know the old joke:

A Canadian comes to a fork in the road. One sign points right and reads: Panel Discussion on Heaven. The other sign points left and reads: Heaven. The Canadian stands there and scratches his/her chin, then chooses the sign on the right: Panel Discussion on Heaven.

Today I did a spit-take with my French-Dark Roast coffee, ruining a good pair of pajama pants and a muscle shirt. I couldn't believe my ears. Harper had this to say about the Arts community:

“I think when ordinary working people come home, turn on the TV and see a gala of a bunch of people, you know, at a rich gala all subsidized by taxpayers claiming their subsidies aren't high enough when they know those subsidies have actually gone up, I'm not sure that's something that resonates with ordinary people,” he said during a campaign stop in Saskatoon.

Before I explore this, let me just state: I'm finding the other candidates a bad alternative that excite no one. I don't know which way I'll vote. I'm watching and listening...and get this...thinking. What terrifies me? He has a point. The only thing I was offended by, was classifying me in a group that is elitist. I've worked on a farm for several summers, I was a paperboy, an usher, a bartender, a waiter etc...toiling all the time to make a living. And I still am. How does that make me an elitist? Yeah....I write screenplays and work 14 hour days as a First AD, eight months of the year. But is that elitist? You tell me. But don't call me elitist because I love what I do.

My hours actually add-up to something higher than an oil-rigger. Trust me, I asked a few when I was shooting a show on an oil rig this summer. Interesting, no? Is my job as physically back-breaking? No...but I'm not stupid. I guess that makes me elitist. Apparently, according to Harper, I'm part of the cocktail-sucking whores who hang around at galas. Then again, Harper's wife is off to a swank party:

"Mr. Harper's barbed shot at whining elites attending glitzy affairs was curious, given that his wife Laureen is the honorary chair of the National Arts Centre's gala next month in Ottawa." - Globe and Mail.

Maybe he's just pissed the misses is going to a 'do' and he can't make it? What if she meets one of those dirty-womanizing artists? Who knows what will happen?!

Anyway, I'm getting carried away. I do that. Back on point: Politicians love it when we talk about how special we culture-workers are and how important we are. They want more of that. It makes us easy to exploit. We become a wedge issue instead of an actual discussion. A 'niche' topic, just like Aboriginal issues, which by the way, have yet to show up on ANY politicians platform.

This election reflects a tide turning on the perceived wisdom of the elites be they in Government, on Wall Street or from Show Business. The fact that some "Famous Canadians" like Wendy Crewson, Colm Feore and Paul Gross stand up in public and whine, does not do my heart any good. Where are the First Nation artists and the middle to lower-income 'art-workers' in all of this? Like me...

That's right...we're working our ass off. And I can't afford the flight to Toronto to have a press conference.

What really needs to happen? We, the artists, have a PR problem. All of us in the 'cultural industries' have failed to educate and connect with the public. Harper and his government know this, and will use the eternal culture and arts debate to their advantage. The Conservatives, and the public, need to see that we're hard working people with most of the same life goals they have.

Culture affects every-walk of life. It's economic and it's about the national soul.

For too long, we've insisted we deserved special treatment without delivering anything "they" could feel proud of. "They" being the Canadian public and mean-spirited, divisive politicians of EVERY BRAND.

Case-in-point: The loathing directed at our athletes during the first two weeks of the recent Olympics is what we get every day because "they" helped us and we didn't bring home anything they could be proud of -- or maybe even feel connected to.

Unfair? Yep. But that's what the Canadian public does...including standing at the crossroads and scratching their chins.

Most artists of all walks, know that we are up against a broken broadcast and film and council funding systems. But the public, doesn't know that.

I firmly believe the real artists in this country will survive what's coming. But the fake ones and their enablers are going to take a serious hit. -Jim Henshaw

The old models don't work and we're dead if we keep defending them. You may not like it, but as I stated before...The Hog is in the Tunnel.

Anyway, vote as you see fit, just vote for the love of Pete.

And, oh yeah, well I worked on a farm I learned how to use a gun. Glad the Conservatives feel that's of use.

I love all of you.

Blood-Soaked Goodness.

2008-09-24T12:22:00.000-07:00

This book has been out for a while, but I always go back to it for inspiration. It's written by Winnipegger Caelum Vatnesdal. Here's an excerpt from the first chapter:

' It's no exaggeration to say that the history of Canadian fiction filmmaking is, in the main, one of catastrophe, neglect and wasted potential. Cursed projects like The Viking (1931), in which the producer and many crew were killed in a boat explosion; the costly box office failure of Canada's flagship big-budget effort Carry On, Sergant!in 1928; a cinema fire in Quebec the previous year which killed a number of children; a string of ill-considered decisions regarding trade and cultural relations with a certain entertainment juggernaut to the south; and much incidental misfortune and poor judgement helped create an industry that has grown into something crippled, wary, and dumbly resentful, like a puppy repeatedly kicked as it was learning to walk. The American film industry was often wearing the boots, but it was Canadians who allowed the booting.'

If you want to explore some Canadian horror history that actually has a great sense of humour and fun, find this book. Vatsdal covers Canada's balladeers of blood, chock-full of sordid pleasures and ladled in blood.

I love it.

Notes on a Drive-In.

2008-09-23T12:22:00.001-07:00

This is an article I wrote for Splice Magazine in June, 2007 for their 30thAnniversary Issue:

Thirty years ago, in the summer of 1977, I saw Star Wars at Regina’s Starlight Drive-In. Unlike other kids, who stood in line at traditional movie theaters. To me, it was an ideal way to see a science fiction film that was to influence far too many filmmakers. The Starlight Drive-In is long since gone…buried under condos and apartment buildings. I also saw an appalling little horror movie called Grizzly. And I loved it. Grizzly was a cheap rip-off of Jaws with a killer bear as a substitute for the shark. Jaws had traumatized me months before, and now I was hooked on being scared silly by killer animals of all sorts. Piranhas, crocodiles and even sewer dwelling mutants called CHUD. I am still, to this day, a fan of everything science fiction and horror. Better to blurt this out right away, so I’m less tempted to retreat from a long hidden shame. The drive-in, to me, was occult as porn. And I was its customer over the years. For the most part, these places gave us all the rejects I dearly loved. The shoddy and exploitative movies that high-brow theatres couldn’t be bothered with. It was a place that invited small crimes. You could sneak friends in via the trunk of a car. Beer could be hidden under seats and windows steamed up if you got lucky. Not anymore.

The beloved drive-in is a dying animal, and has been for some time. Cinema 6 has closed…again. Two years ago I made my last trip to see a movie there. That night’s showing consisted of: Wedding Crashers(full of smart-asses) and Monster-In-Law(horrible). But the movies felt irrelevant. It was the atmosphere on a warm summer evening. The place was packed with cars and the young and old. The smell of greasy food. Questionable hamburgers, fries and hot dogs cooked in ancient oil. The nightmare-inducing popcorn, probably popped in the same oil. Seeing children play on rusty swings and life-threatening merry-go-rounds below the big screen. Trucks parked backwards so you could set up your lawn chair and plop your feet on the tailgate. It was THE PLACE I loved. It all inspired me to write a screenplay. And that’s where my troubles start. Oh yes. I almost forgot to introduce myself. I’m Trevor Cunningham, and I’m a local filmmaker.

Here’s some back story. I’ve been an Assistant Director for the past nine years. I’ve written some short films(Apple Jack, Blueberry) and even directed a few(The Pedestrian, Carpe Noctem). But all of it left me feeling kind of empty. Like I wasn’t making the films I loved to watch, or writing the stories that sparked my sense of fun. In other words, the stuff I saw at the drive-in. That’s when I came up with something called ‘Bride of the Grave Robber’. It’s a simple story about a mad doctor’s lowly assistant, his escape from a mental institute and he hides out at…you guessed it… a drive-in. It was the result of a popcorn dream, and the fact I was watching old horror movies a friend had lent me.

About the popcorn dreams. The nuttiness of many of my stories is the result of popcorn. Another hold-over from the drive-in days. I avoid the stuff most of the time, but when the urge hits, or when the bank account looks low, I make a huge batch and wash it down with Dr. Pepper. I go to bed. I have weird thoughts and dreams. I get up and write them down and sell them. Or at least try. So far, every popcorn thought or dream I’ve written down has been given development money. So there you go. I owe my writing ‘career’ to popcorn. Anyway. Monster shows. Drive-In. Popcorn. It all came together. I wrote a treatment, sent it off to Telefilm and received funding. Later, I even got funding from Saskfilm and Movie Central. All was good in the world and with a few re-writes and a slight title change, production would not be far off. That was in 2004.

It is a common mistake to believe, once you receive development money, that putting your opus before a camera will only take a year or two. You couldn’t be more wrong. Now, granted, screenplays can be developed over years before even seeing the light of day. If at all. I know this. We all know this. But what is more frightening than any drive-in horror movie…are the notes. Notes from ‘Readers’. Notes from Funders. Notes from Broadcasters. Notes. Notes. Notes. Feedback like: Is this a horror movie? It’s too campy. I don’t get it. Is it funny or is it a horror movie? Is this an art house movie? Too ‘culty’ to market. Our problem is with the ‘creative’. Is this supposed to be ironic? Too gory. Too serious…etc…etc. One starts to listen to them all too. The problem is, they all contradict each other. No one really knows what they want, or how to articulate it. After all, you want to please and it’s their money. This can be a mistake for any screenwriter starting out. Before you know it, you don’t recognize a damn thing about your story. As a matter of fact, you hate it and it does not feel like yours anymore. Which leads to even more self-doubt and the inevitable inner debate. Does English Canada even WANT to see or make movies anymore?

When I had finished a fourth draft last year, I thought about ‘Bride of the Grave Robber’. I thought it was, to put it mildly, dumb. The more I thought about the story, the dumber I felt. I filed it away. I had given up the ghost and was tired of pounding my head against the wall. It was time to move on to something else. Maybe even get a ‘real’ job. Then, on a trip to Winnipeg, I saw an old abandoned drive-in near Indian Head. And the answer came to me in a rush. I took all those well-intentioned notes, filed them in the garbage, and started over.

As you read this I’m probably eating popcorn, washing it down with a Dr. Pepper and scouting drive-ins. The new title is ‘The Grave Robber’s Apprentice'…and the story feels like mine again. It has risen from the dead. And with a little luck, coming soon to a drive-in near you.

Final Girl.

2008-09-23T12:22:00.000-07:00

Work, work, work. Hit the mid-point of the screenplay. More later.

Roughrider Fans are Ugly.

2008-09-21T12:21:00.000-07:00

So much for my predicted win by the Riders. The autumn months are never calm in Saskatchewan. Back to work, back to school and football starts to mean something. Autumn is a very traditional time here, a time of strong rituals and the celebrating of odd holidays like Halloween, the Harvest Moon and Satanism, which can have ominous implications for some people.

Autumn is always a time of hoarding for the coming winter. Politicians are active on old people and fleece the public, hoping you feel helpless enough to put them in office. There is always a rash of kidnapping, abductions and drinking and driving in the football months. Most of these things are wrong and ugly, but at least they are traditional.

The mouth-breathing assholes who threw beer at the B.C. Lions being case-in-point. A tradition of bad behaviour by Roughrider fans. It's sure to happen when fans have a hole in their soul and a misplaced sense of self-worth that only a football team can fill. It's a tradition sure to happen in the fall, as sure as your driveway will ice over, your furnace will blow up, and you will be rammed in traffic by an uninsured driver in a stolen car. But what the hell? That's why you have insurance, eh?

On a night when the province was honouring Ron Lancaster, a man with class, the fans behaved like hyenas. Since we are now considered a 'have' province, I hope these delusions of persecution die. And I hope we start defining ourselves a province who has something more to culturally 'hang our hats on' than football. Don't get me wrong. I love the Rider games, but having it define it's people is getting old.

It was a weird game full of bad play and dumb decisions. I'll blame it on the Harvest Moon.

Grave Robbing the Culture.

2008-09-20T12:21:00.000-07:00

Finished my proposals and sent all of them off. The latest for production money from the Canada Council. It was a complete revisit and rewrite of Bride of the Grave Robber, now called ‘The Grave Robber’s Apprentice’. I have NEVER received a Canada Council Grant. Ever. I’ve applied two previous times. Maybe the third time will be the charm. I’ve never received an Arts Grant of any sort, not even from my home province of Saskatchewan. But it is interesting putting these things in front of faceless juries to be judged by who-knows-who. Money from Telefilm, Saskfilm and a couple of Broadcasters? Yes. That I’ve had, and the total over 5 years since I last made a project would make a Taco Time employee weep.

Meanwhile, a lot of artists who were making profound contributions fell by the wayside or left the country because no matter their talent or abilities they simply weren't able to crack the cultural funding vault that could have sustained them here. Not only nationally, but on a provincial level as well. I’ve lost count of how many folks in the film industry, and other disciplines, have left for Vancouver, Montreal or Toronto. Saskatchewan’s export is...people. Some say that’s changing with all the money choking the oil and gas pipes. Well...how many ‘riggers’ are culturally expressing the society they live in?

We've always been a place that's traded away our natural resources through systems where a powerful, interconnected few unfairly benefit from the labor of the many because they've been born to or bought membership in the ruling cabal. - Jim Henshaw, Legion of Decency

Again, I’m seeing this ugly head pop-up on a provincial level. Yes, we’ve had some success, but I’m not seeing new voices get support. Yeah, sure, as a crew members to feed the monster, but none of the writers, directors and creative personnel. You know, folks who actually create shows and work their asses off trying to finance them. Now that service deals have dried up for various reasons and one successful show is calling it a day....there is close to NOTHING coming out the pipe. A large imbalance has occurred. And every time a down-turn like this happens(I’ve seen it twice) I’ve heard some of the gate-keepers stare blankly, surprised even, and exclaim...”Where is our new producers, directors, writers, actors etc?!!!”

And that's just as true of how we manage our greatest renewable resource, the imaginations of our artists. - Jim Henshaw

Bread-crumbs for documentaries, a smattering of development and production money is not a balanced or viable industry. I’ve seen talented filmmakers and writers get over-looked in favour of the latest asshole to blow through town, use the tax credit, never to return. How is that a renewable resource in terms of culture? And no, it’s not just Americans. And so-called ‘training money’ is used as a financial tool, where not a lick of training happens and is used to ‘deem’ someone. Nobody believes it for a second. How do you ‘train’ a director?

Our redistributed public largess goes first to established corporate entities through CTF, Telefilm, the Canada Council, etc. then to the "favorites", the players who keep being funded no matter their lack of success and then to the rest in demographics that are endlessly parsed by race, region, sex, sexual orientation or debutante status so that we seldom see any new or challenging voices nurtured to maturity. - Jim Henshaw

This is why, for the past four years, I could give a flying fuck about TIFF. Same people doing the same things and getting the same non-result. Atom Egoyan anyone?

There's a middle-management elitism in our system that is hurting all of us, artists and audience alike. Maybe it's also time to let them know that we don't like a lot of the films and TV we're making either, but we don't have any control over that -- and won't as long as the real money keeps going to non-artists with a record of failure. - Jim Henshaw

That...my friends, sums it up. A hard-boiled shakedown is in order. Do I think I’ll get any dough for these proposals? I might. Do I deserve any of it? Maybe. But some of the ‘gate-keepers’ have to go.

Thick Skulls and Ghosts.

2008-09-20T12:20:00.000-07:00

Too many in this gutless world have come under the impression that Canadian filmmakers are a race of finks, queers and candy asses to be bilked and bullied. It should be noted, therefore, in the public interest, that some of us possess guns. Especially out West. Other artists, it is said, tend to enjoy violence for its on sake, and feel that a good fight, with the inevitable destruction of nearby equipment and furniture, is nearly as fine for the nerves as a quart of Bushmills Irish Whiskey. Here are two things that have crawled through my thick skull as I head into the weekend:

1 - The Roughriders will win on Sunday. Ron Lancaster's ghost will haunt the field and the Lions will feel dumber than Bush for having opened their cake-holes before the game.

2 - The only good thing that can come out of this election is the demise of Dion. Why this party chose such a bizarre and incomprehensible bobble-doll is beyond me.

Have fun, eat hotdogs and drink beer. It's the last offical weekend of Summer.

The Hog is in the Tunnel.

2008-09-19T12:20:00.000-07:00

As a I struggle through a draft of Final Girl, elections choke the North American airwaves. In Canada, the third one in four years...at a cost of $240,000,000 each time to the taxpayer. Canada claims to hate elections, but always chooses a minority government, thus guarantees it. That's the Great White North for ya. Here, be ready to run at all times. It is like living in the heart of Friday night with no music and cheap friends.

Shit happens, as they say, and you don't always need music to play musical chairs. There is also a sense of doom in the air. Canadian artists, filmmakers, musicians, actors, sculptors etc, have had a year of a thousand cuts. This has been a year I've written letters to so many politicians, I've lost count. It all started in February with Bill c-10. Some have responded, most have not. This has also been a year in which I've sent out more proposals for funding then any other. The cultural industry is full of smart fools who won't learn, and on some days I am one of them. I try to remain optimistic. I have gone down with more ships than Captain Ahab and usually for honourable reasons, but I'm getting tired of it. I am especially getting tired of going out to sea with dumb bastards who punch holes in the bottom of the boat and call it smart.

The names change and the details vary from one election to the next, but the bottom line is consistent: There is no pulse.

That is the nut of it, and on some nights it is a very spooky thing to contemplate. There is no sense of urgency. There is a blizzard of news, lies, gaffes, and other thick information coming back, but there is no wild music that comes with the feeling of risk in the air. The fat is in the fire and the deal is going down and the only thing for sure is that a lot of folks in the 'Arts' and 'Film and TV business' are going to wish that wolves had stolen us from our cradles when the votes get counted on election day.

Me? I'll keep plugging away, but I'm going to sit near the exit. The hog is in the tunnel and coming forward fast.